So I'm Not Going To Win Any Awards...

Here's a little embarrassing drama that unfolded on Monday...

On Monday morning my smoke alarms went off (I have three) for no apparent reason. The first happened around 9am. It went off then shut down in 15 seconds. I thought it was strange since I didn't have anything cooking and couldn't smell any smoke. But just chalked it up to a weird fluke. It happened again around 10:30 with it coming on and shutting off in a very short time span. I was beginning to think maybe there was some electrical problem and would have to mention it to James when he arrived home. I did have the laundry going and tried to sniff around to see if there was any smoke or the smell of anything burning but didn't smell anything out of place. At 1:30 it went off again and this time it wouldn't stop. Now everyone knows how annoying smoke alarms are and to have all three going off is definitely ear-piercing. I went to the one in the laundry room first and tried to turn it off but couldn't figure out how to take the battery cover off. So I went upstairs to try the one closest to the bedroom (Blake was sleeping and the door was closed so he didn't hear it much) but still couldn't figure out how to take the cover off. I was afraid I would electrocute myself or something if I pried it off too hard. All the while the alarms are just wailing and my ears are starting to ring. I was becoming really frustrated and decided to call James to see what I could do. He tried to explain how to take the battery cover off and I decided to just try it again. I went back downstairs to the laundry room and was finally able to pull the battery out. One down, two more to go. I got the other two unplugged and called James back to explain what happened. He was really concerned and suggested that I call the non-emergency number to ask if they could send someone by to check the alarms. He asked me if the smoke alarms were also carbon monoxide alarms and I told him that I didn't know.

Blake is awake now and needing to nurse so I decide to nurse him first and then call the non-emergency line because I knew if I called first while still nursing then who knows how long (or short) it will take someone to arrive and no one wants to answer the door with a baby strapped to the boob or deal with a wailing hungry infant while they check things out! But here I am sitting and worried thoughts are going through my head..."I didn't smell any smoke so I know that's not the cause but what if they are carbon monoxide detectors and I have CM in my house? I do have the dryer running so maybe there is something wrong with that? That would totally stink if I couldn't use my dryer because I have a load in the wash and what would I do with it? Go to a laundomat? Go to my mom's? What if its carbon monoxide and Blake and I have been inhaling it all day today?? Oh, the windows have been opened all day so I don't think we would really be affected by it. But who knows? What if we have inhaled enough that they find us dead on the couch, right in the middle of nursing? A horrifying thought! I know CM is odorless and invisible, a deadly gas. Even if we inhaled a little would that have any adverse effects on us??"

To make matters worse, my house is A MESS!!! Every single room has junk cluttered up in it, dirty dishes pile the sink and countertops, the kitchen table is littered with papers and junk, my hardwood floors are disgusting and covered in dog hair since Guinness is going through a big shed now, and all my clothes are dirty so I am in my pajamas at the moment! I usually have something to wear on laundry day but my clothing selection is limited at the moment and I just planned on staying in my pajamas and was going to spend the day cleaning up the house anyway. All that is out the window since I need to call someone to come and figure out why my smoke alarms were going off. So I finish nursing and call the non-emergency number. I explain what happened and what I need to the woman who answers and she transfers me to dispatch. Then a man answers the line and says "9-1-1, How can I help you?" Oohkay, so I was transferred to 9-1-1... I tell him what was going on and that I would like someone to just come and check it out. He gets my info and says he is sending the fire department. I thank him and hang up. Crap that means they will be here in a couple minutes and I need to find something to wear and make myself look somewhat decent!

I quickly throw on a skirt and top and I can already hear the sirens in the distance thanks to my open windows. I put the dog in the garage, look at my dirty kitchen and sigh, grab the baby and open the door. Three firemen in full gear show up and I let them in, tell them they caught me on a bad day since the house is a mess and try to smile as they walk through my dirty house. I want to tell them that today was the day I was planning on cleaning, that my house really doesn't look like this all the time, and just give whatever answer I can so they aren't thinking "so this is what stay-at-home moms do all day". Ugh!! But I don't say anything and wait as they give me the verdict on what is causing the smoke alarms to go off. They find the culprit and come down to show me. "We must have caught you on a really bad day, ma'am", the fireman tells me as he shows me a smoke alarm that is chock full of cobwebs, dead bugs, and spiders. Ew! He explains that when the smoke alarms get dirty like that, that if a spider crawls across the sensor inside then the alarm transmits that as smoke and it sets off. He said it was too dirty and not worth saving so we should get a new one. Great, my house is dirty and so are my smoke alarms. I'm definitely not winning any "cleanest house" awards this year. I can just imagine the thoughts in thier heads "Caught her on a bad day? Right. Its probably always like this because she never cleans which is proven in her cobweb filled smoke alarm!" Honestly, I never even thought about taking my vaccuum hose and sucking the dirt out every once in a while. I had no idea bugs could even get in there!

I thanked the men for their time and am relieved that a crisis has been averted and that it was nothing serious. But I was pretty embarrassed that the reason it went off at all was because it was dirty. Way to go me. Bet they are all having a laugh about it back at the firehouse. Darn dirty smoke alarm!